As I sit here and reminisce about the last 12 weeks of my life, starting from the day we had our sweet, baby boy, Asher, I wonder things like “How did I survive? Good lord, that was hard. That postpartum stuff is no joke. That baby sure did rock my world. That was the longest, blurriest 12 weeks of my life.” Did I enjoy it? I suppose. Were there days I felt like I was going to die? Absolutely.
Wondering how in God’s name I made it through those first 3 months, I realize I couldn’t have done it without God, my family, my faith and my husband.
If you are about to have a baby, or are just curiously contemplating on beginning your family, here are a few items to carry with you:
1. Accept Help
Yes, accept help. Sure, your mom may not burp your baby the way you’d like her to, and you’ll sit there and stare in fear that your baby will somehow pass out or suffocate if not burped properly, but LET IT GO. Your mom raised you (this goes for your MIL and others as well), and you survived. They know what they’re doing.
2. Sleep When the Baby Sleeps
Cliche, I know. But seriously, how are you ever going to get sleep if you don’t sleep when the baby does? Leave those dishes in the sink, nobody cares anyways, and they’ll understand.
3. Don’t Forget to Drink Lots of Water and Eat Lots of Veggies
Many times, I would fall asleep at night, wondering if I had eaten anything that day. Home cooked meals may not be doable, but for the love of God, order delivery. You need to eat, you need to take care of yourself, and you don’t eat (and you’re breastfeeding), your supply will go down. Take care of yourself mama!
3. Get Help from a Lactation Consultant
I was always worried that my baby wasn’t getting enough, and it ran me wild. But, I also didn’t have a clue what I was doing. It’s no wonder I struggled because nobody told me the tips and tricks to the “rules of breastfeeding”. The good part: you should get free support through the hospital you delivered at, and you’ll also have other women you can talk to who understand how difficult breastfeeding is. (Sidenote: my hospital had breastfeeding groups twice a month that other mothers would attend… check in to those as well!)
4. Take Long Showers… with Your Drink of Choice
Many nights, when my husband would get home, I would hand the baby off to him and disappear into the bathroom with a beer for two hours. Yes, seriously, TWO hours. I spent the first 30 minutes on Facebook drinking my beer, the next 30 minutes just standing in the shower, doing nothing, and the final 10 minutes actually showering. Then, for the next hour, I would take my good ol’ time painting my toenails, putting tons of cream on my stretch marks, beautifying my callused feet that I had been standing on all day, and doing something with my hair. It was the ONE thing that made me feel human. Oh… and that was actually when I could get my teeth brushed for the day too (sorry, husband).
5. Shop on Amazon Prime
Who goes to the grocery store with a 2 month old? Sure, I don’t care if you passed your 6-week check up with flying colors (I didn’t… more about that later), let Amazon deliver all of that TP, paper towels, diapers, wipes, and every other thing you forgot to buy. And, soak up the “subscribe & save” on diapers through Amazon Prime!
6. Take Saturday’s for Yourself.
It’s your one day off. The day your hubby is home, and can help out. Again, leave the dishes in the sink, go hang out with the girls or go get a haircut while you give your hubby time with your baby (as opposed to hovering over him making sure he’s burping your baby right). Plus, it serves as a moment that dad gets to be a dad, and see just how hard it is to be at home with a baby all day.😉
7. Don’t Worry About the Dishes in the Sink, or the Dust on the Table. Nobody cares.
See “Sleep When The Baby Sleeps”.
8. Spend a Little More on Clothes for Your Post-Baby Bod.
Honey, you just went through 9.5 months of morning sickness, aches, pains, sleepless nights, painful skin stretching, heartburn, and crazy hormones. And then, you had to push that baby out, and somehow work your way through postpartum, diaper wearing recovery where you were expected to sleep 1 hour a night while you couldn’t walk or lay down comfortably for 6 weeks because your hoo-haw hurt too bad. Treat yourself! You might be a little self conscious about how your body has changed, but your body just did a miraculous thing! It created a human, and birthed a human. Go out, buy yourself a nice pair of True Religion’s that’ll make your ass look fine, and rock them! You won’t regret it.
9. Take Care of Yourself, Mom!
Need I say more? Postpartum depression is very real, ladies. Going through child birth is hard enough, and raising a child those first 3 months is even harder. Some days you feel like your body is shutting down and you’re about to die (sorry, don’t mean to scare you, but it’s true). You will be delirious, and the longer you don’t sleep, the unhappier you are, and the unhealthier you are. Happy mom = happy baby. Let me say that again… Happy Mom = Happy Baby.
If breastfeeding is a struggle, and the thought of pumping makes you nauseas, formula is just as good! It’s not worth it risking your sanity. And besides, a stressed out mom is unhealthier for a baby than getting to eat breast milk versus formula.
One more time… Happy Mom = Happy Baby.
Make those first 3 months the best 3 months of your life, ENJOY it, they’re only newborns for a very short time. Don’t wish it away, let them be little.